I have spent my entire life trying to figure out how to fit in somewhere. Anywhere.
What it takes to be truly loved by someone. Anyone.
My "family" was the first place I learned that nothing I do is right, and trying to convey my feelings about anything is only going to backfire on me. I'm not allowed to have feelings without them getting thrown in my face and turned on me as a weapon. I can't say anything because anything I say, can and WILL be used against me at every remote chance at any given moment 'til the end of time.
There isn't a single person on the face of the planet that I can truly trust. I guess I was born solely for the sadistic amusement of everyone else. To walk through this life in this soulless body with only half a heart and no hope that things will ever get any better.
In case you are wondering: no, I don't have any faith. That was torn away from me when I realized that religious people are the worst hypocrites of all. They live to tear you down and scrutinize your every choice in life. Yet when you realize the things they do behind closed doors, or when no one is looking, they are worse than you and that is why they are so quick to call you out for any little thing.
So here's what I have to say to everybody who has ever been in my life so far: To hell with you! You don't make an effort to notice the good things about me! All you notice is the perceived flaws I have! The mistakes I make! I hate everyone! I hope your life becomes as miserable as you make me feel!
